Desserts

I CAN’T HAVE AN AFFAIR BECAUSE IT’S WRONG & I DON’T WANT EARL TO KILL ME PIE

Any Waitress fans out there?  Or anyone just obsessed with pie?  Maybe your thinking of having an affair, you did a quick google search to see if it was a good idea and somehow you ended up confused at my blog.  Regardless, the I Can’t Have an Affair Because It’s Wrong and I Don’t Want Earl to Kill Me Pie is delicious.  It’s a rich marbled chocolate cheesecake on a cookie crumb crust.  It’s a swirl of emotions between right and wrong, much how Jenna felt in the movie.

There’s a saying that pie fixes everything, and I happen to agree.  I’ve always had a fascination with pie, truthfully I love it more than cake. Pie has so much character, just looking at one you can see the love and labor that goes into one.

I still remember very vividly the day I saw the movie Waitress at the movie theatre.  My girls went to a twice a week mothers’ day out at a nearby church and it was pouring rain outside.  I had nothing to do and I thought why don’t I go to the movies by myself?  I’d never done it before and the thought of sneaking off alone to a movie really appealed to me, it seemed naughty for a Mom of 3 to do mid-day.  I had no idea what Waitress was about, it was the only movie listed I had time to see, so I went for it.

That day I fell in love with the story, the colors, the pies…. everything.  I remember leaving the theater feeling so warm and fuzzy.  To this day when I’m feeling kinda down it’s my go to movie to watch.  Watching the Waitress musical on Broadway was another iconic moment in my life a few years ago.  It was an incredible experience my husband surprised me with on my birthday and I was thrilled to see The Waitress Pie Book for sale.

If you read my blog regularly you know my daughter Haley and I share the same birthday and over the years she has grown to love this movie just as much as I do.  She was thrilled when I brought home the pie book and she’s determined that we make every one in the book! At her request this year instead of cake we made a pie, and out of the entire book she picked this swirled marble cheesecake deliciousness.  I think she made a good choice!

I’ve listed the recipe below, be sure to check out my tips at the very bottom.  This pie does have a lot of steps, but don’t let that overwhelm you, it’s not a hard pie to make.

I Can't Have an Affair Because It's Wrong & I Don't Want Earl to Kill Me Pie

Ingredients

Chocolate cookie crumb pie shell:

  • 1 3/4 cups chocolate wafer cookie crumbs (*see my tips below)
  • 6 tbs (3/4 stick) unsalted butter, melted

Cheesecake filling:

  • 4 oz bittersweet chocolate, chopped
  • 3/4 cup heavy cream (divided)
  • 4 oz white chocolate, chopped
  • 12 oz cream cheese, at room temperature
  • 1/3 cup sweetened condensed milk
  • 1 1/2 tsp vanilla extract

Instructions

Instructions for the pie shell:

  • Preheat the oven to 350°  
  • Toss together crumbs and butter in a medium sized bowl to moisten.  Press the mixture onto the bottom and up the sides of a 9 1/2-inch deep pie pan.  
  • Refrigerate at least 15 minutes to firm up the butter.  
  • Bake in the oven for about 10 minutes, or until set.  Cool on a wire rack to room temperature.

Instructions for the filling:

  • Place the chopped chocolate in a medium heatproof bowl.  Warm 1/4 cup of cream into a saucepan over medium heat until small bubbles form around the edge.  Pour over the chocolate and let stand for 1 minute to soften, then whisk until smooth.
  • Melt the white chocolate in a large glass bowl in the microwave at 50 percent power in 20-second increments (*see my tips below) until the pieces begin to lose their shape, and then stir until smooth.  Cool to room temperature.
  • Add remaining 1/2 cup of cream, cream cheese, sweetened condensed milk, and vanilla to the white chocolate bowl.  Beat with a mixer on high speed until smooth.  Pour into the pie shell.
  • Pour the chocolate mixture over the cream cheese and then swirl slowly with the end of a spoon to marble the filling.  Refrigerate 4 hours, or until firm.

*LAURA’S TIPS:

To quickly bring cream cheese to room temperature, dice up into small pieces on a cutting board.  It will soften very quickly.

For the pie crust you need to use round cookie wafers, not the crispy stick type.  If you can’t find any use oreos and scrape out the frosting like I did.  I processed my cookies in the food processor for a nice smooth texture, I did this in 2 separate batches.

For best results use a high quality chocolates, I used a Bakers chocolate bar from the baking aisle and chopped by hand on a cutting board.

I wrote the melting instructions as written but I did need to microwave the white chocolate a lot longer.  I ended up using full power but I kept a very close eye on it.  Be careful because microwaves vary in power and you can’t recover burnt chocolate.

I like to use my own homemade vanilla extract, good vanilla is everything when it comes to baking!  It’s actually simple to make and you can read my instructions Make Your Own Vanilla Extract blog post.  It’s an old post and the photos aren’t very pretty but it’s great vanilla extract!

The texture and flavors of this pie were amazing.  We also liked how it wasn’t overly sweet either, it was just right.   Hardcore movie fans will know this recipe is different from the actual movie.  Whatever… just don’t have an affair on your husband.  And can we all agree how much we hate Earl?  Even if he does have really good hair.

Shop some of my favorite kitchen favorites below!

Recipe courtesy of The Waitress Pie Book, from the files of Jenna Hunterson.  Recipes by Sheri Castle.

Laura

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